Sometimes there just are no words...

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I'm not sure where my words have gone, but they just don't flow from my fingertips to the keyboard like they once did.  I used to be able to pour out my heart here and feel a kind of release in doing so.  My heart is in knots over lots of different things right now, and the words just aren't there.

Kristen's 3rd birthday was 3 weeks ago.  We spent the day together as a family, remembering our littlest girl and making memories with our two older girls.  It's one of the most bittersweet days of the year.

In honor of Kristen's birthday, we sent 30 bears to Children's Mercy Hospital, to be distributed to bereaved parents as they reach the 6-month mark following the death of their child.  No, it's not pleasant to think about, but the fact is that children die.  They leave behind parents and siblings whose lives are never the same.  Those families ache to have someone remember them, to remember their sweet child, months and years down the road.  My hope is that the little knitted bear they receive will be a reminder that someone cares...and that God cares.

So many of my friends helped to work on those bears.  Over the course of four months, they knit, stuffed and stitched.  They donated supplies, time and food.  They supported a cause close to my heart and supported my own broken heart in the process.  The really beautiful thing is that, whether they know it or not, many of them continue to do so.

I will close with a collection of photos.  Maybe they will speak louder than the words that seem to escape me.

Our "Peace of my Heart" birthday cake
(Emily made the bear out of Rice Krispie treats;
Grace drew the dove from our logo)

Kristen's birthday wreath

Balloon release

Our matching wristbands read, "Forever in my heart"

Kristen's tree

Grace decorated my water bottle with the Peace of my Heart logo


Delicious burgers at a cute little place in Lindsborg

Near The Old Mill Museum

On the hunt for a geocache

Coronado Heights

Some of the bears before packaging

The birthday bear I made for my desk


Bears for CMH

More bears for CMH
Bears packed and ready for the trip to KC
(Thanks to Bryan & Angie!)

2009 Memory Quilt
1st Floor across from the CMH Chapel

I love you, Little Stuff ♥